Realization

Thursday night, Ryan and I were invited to a BBQ at our neighbor's home. We were a little surprised by the invite, but decided we definitely wanted to go. We didn't know what to expect or who else would be there. As we rounded the corner to their house, we noticed another young couple from our ward crossing the street heading to the same place we were. Ryan jokingly said, "What is this? A young couple BBQ?" (The couple that invited us have 5 kids and the dad is a member of the Bishopric.) Once we were inside, we both laughed as we realized that yes, that is exactly what it was. There were about 6 young couples in the living room - some who I already knew, and a few that I at least recognized - mostly because they were pulled into the primary the moment they moved in like we were. I sat looking around the room, enjoying the feeling of being surrounded by other young couples when a very distinct and somewhat depressing thought crossed my mind...

Ryan came up behind me at this very moment and whispered, "Dude - you're old."

I spun around to face him. "That's exactly what I was just thinking!" I explained. Together we looked back at the room full of couples and realized that we are so NOT young any more. Most of them have only been married a year or less. One couple has been married for 3 months. 3 months! Compared to our 5 years - that feels like nothing! And the difference in marriage time was one thing - but what really brought it home was the fact that I was the only one sporting a baby belly. In fact, I think that if this little get together had been a few months down the road instead of now - there is a chance our invite might have been forfeited by right of the "no children allowed" clause.

It was the strangest feeling in the world. For the most part on any given day I feel like I just graduated from high school. The fact that my little sister who is 7.5 years younger than me is now a senior is so incredibly strange. It's like my mind simply won't accept that time has moved on. (I am not saying I am stuck in the high school phase- I just don't feel like I have gotten any older.) In fact, earlier this spring while I was substituting a dance class, I recognized the music the ballet class was dancing to and realized that it was the same music I had danced to as the Crystal Fountain Fairy from 'Sleeping Beauty' as my first solo. The girls I was teaching became very excited and asked, "Oh! So did you dance with so-and-so?"

"Who?" I asked.

"You know! So-and-so!" (There really was a name, but I don't remember.)

I told them that I didn't know who that was and a suddenly the girls jaws dropped.

"You mean you were in the 'Sleeping Beauty' before that one?! How old are you?!"

I quickly defended myself telling them that I really am not that old - it just so happens that the last time they performed that show, besides obviously the one they were referring to, was when I was like - 14 or so. This seemed to pacify them, but the truth of it is - I really am that old! It's insane how quick it goes by.

I don't know why it takes little moments like that - teaching the next generation of 14-15 year old dancers, or standing in a room full of truly "young couples" to make you realize where you are in your life.

For a moment, I felt like we were the ones having the honeymoon baby. But then I realized that it really has been 5 years, and that 5 years is actually a pretty long time. A very long time around here anyway. It was a surreal feeling. There are times I still can't believe that there is a child growing in me. In fact, it really is beyond anything my brain can comprehend. But it's exciting. It's a whole new chapter! All of those other couples are where they are supposed to be in their lives, just like we are in ours. And it's a wonderful thing! Yes - it was "sad" to realize that I am not as young as I think I am sometimes, but life is amazing. Exactly where it should be.

As we guessed, the BBQ was to help the young couples in the ward get to know each other. Funny, how it took someone outside this "group" to think of that and arrange it. We had a blast. We all enjoyed great food and played games outside. It was a ton of fun! Hopefully this will lead to some good friendships and at least a connection in the ward. Sometimes it's hard to feel very connected to a ward when you are young and childless. It was a great idea and I am thankful to our sweet neighbor for putting it together.

We were all asked to bring a side dish, and so I thought I would share mine - a delicious recipe for a quick, easy salad that is sure to be a huge hit.

1 package vanilla pudding (I use the big box)

1 container whipped topping

2-3 Granny Smith apples

1 package (or more) fun size Snicker bars (meaning 8 individual snack size bars)

Make the pudding as directed. Fold in the whipped topping. Chop up apples and Snickers. Tada! Pure delicious goodness.

There are many variations of this recipe, but this is the one I went with for our BBQ and it was devoured. So I may have been the only pregnant girl there, and we may have been the "old" married couple of our young couple group - but I can still make a mean "fruit" salad.